I asked the Lord, that I might grow In faith, and love, and every grace; Might more of His salvation know, And seek more earnestly His face. I hoped that in some favored hour At once He’d answer my request, And by His love’s constraining power Subdue my sins, and give me rest. Instead of this, He made me feel The hidden evils of my heart; And let the angry powers of hell Assault my soul in every part. Yea more, with His own hand He seemed Intent to aggravate my woe; Crossed all the fair designs I schemed, Blasted my gourds, and laid me low. “Lord, why is this?” I trembling cried, “Wilt thou pursue Thy worm to death?” “‘Tis in this way,” the Lord replied, “I answer prayer for grace and faith. These inward trials I employ From self and pride to set thee free; And break thy schemes of earthly joy, That thou may’st seek thy all in me" (Issac Newtown)
We recently spent some time in Chiang Dao situated about 1 half hours' drive from Chiang Mai. Before I arrived, I didn't know what to expect and felt quite apprehensive. The week that we spent there was priceless and I would not exchange it for anything in this world! I can tell you now, that the Lisu Christians in this part of the world (northern Thailand) and in Burma, are one of the most beautiful people I have ever met! They are humble, teachable, simple, have pliable hearts that are bent towards God and telling people about Jesus! We met many different tribal Lisu people, but got to know the students at the James O Fraser Centre a little bit better. They are a blessing to us and I thank God for each one of them!
They epitomise what it means to have joy in the Lord, despite their circumstances. Many of these students have been through really tough times, but they are my "heros", for they inspire me to take discipleship more seriously and to live out what it means to carry my cross daily.
I am especially touched by the lives of Jim and Linda Mckintosh, who gave up their earthly posessions in Australia; their comfort and security and what they knew well...to go to a foreign land...much like Abraham...except that there is no promised land...Yet! We know however, that wherever God takes us, we can see glimpses of heaven through the community of God's people...and I see that very much in this beautiful land of Chiang Dao.
The Lord has laid a huge burden on my heart for the Mckintoshes. Their lives have hit a chord in my life...a chord that is familiar to God's voice...heeding me to take note of their godly examples and obedience, for the sake of God's kingdom.
I love my brothers and sisters so much and I look forward to seeing them all again!
Strangely enough, the more God reveals Himself to me from His word, the more confounded I am, by His unsearchable, mystifying, undeniably perplexing ways.
Surely with our very imperfect and limited understanding of how God rules His world, we are sometimes left dumbfounded by the circumstances we and our friends find ourselves in. But, through baffling moments of darkness, come the voice of our good Father to trust in Him.
When God reassured Abram of His good intentions for Him, “Do not be afraid, Abram, I am your shield, your very great reward”. ..”Look up at the heavens and count the stars- if indeed you can count them, so shall your offspring be”.[1]
Yet, with that blessing, came many long years of waiting. Unfortunately, in that time of lingering hope, Abraham slipped up by taking matters into his own hands, thinking that he would give God a head start. Encouraged by Sarah, he slept with Hagar while waiting for the promise of an heir to be fulfilled. Often, we also fail in similar fashion, thinking that we know better than the God of the universe who fashioned us with His own hands.
But God in His faithfulness, made good His promise, and after twenty five long years of waiting, God manifested His glory powerfully by defying medical science, in the opening up of Sarah’s dead and shrunken womb.
Amazingly enough, it was also twenty five years between the unfolding of God’s dream to Joseph, to the fulfillment of his brothers bowing to him, as ruler of all Egypt, after Pharaoh.
Undeniably, his time of darkness and suffering in the pit, enslavement and imprisonment was hellish, and I am sure that many a time, he thought that God had forgotten him.
But God in His wisdom and sovereignty allowed the sins of Joseph’s brothers, to accomplish His good will. “You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good, to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives” [2]
I recently read Elizabeth Elliot’s reflections on trusting God. She recalls the death of her husband and that of four other young men.
“The five men had been missionaries, not cannibals. They had gone into Auca territory to take the gospel there, not to eat Indians. They loved God. They trusted him. They prayed for protection, guidance and success, and they had put their faith in him as shield and defender. As we, their wives prayed with them over every step of the preparations for this venture, we thought surely God would protect, guide and give success. But it was the Indians who had the success. They won. What then is faith? What in heaven’s name do we mean when we say, “In God we trust?”[3]
Even God’s son did not escape pain and suffering. We know that God’s purposes for us, is to be conformed and transformed to the likeness of His son. So, what does that mean? I think it means that suffering is a part of God’s plan for our lives.
“A man visited the studio of a sculptor, and in the middle of the room sat a huge slab of marble. “What are you going to sculpt out of that marble?” the man asked. “A horse”, answered the sculptor. “How will you do that” the visitor asked. “I will take a hammer and a chisel and knock off everything that doesn’t look like a horse”….. God’s purpose with us is to knock off us everything that doesn’t look like Jesus. [4]
“Letting go of what the world calls safety and surrendering to the Lord is our insurance of fulfillment. Christ knew his Father and offered himself unreservedly into His hands. If we let ourselves be lost for his sake, trusting the same God as Lord of all, we shall find safety where Christ found his, in the bosom of the Father”[5]
Perhaps, upon pondering the ways of God, I am no longer surprised at the pain and suffering we all go through whilst on earth, awaiting our blessed hope of glory. God has His perfect timing for His purposes to be fulfilled in our lives, in His own mysterious ways.
When You lead me to the valley of vision I can see You in the heights And though my humbling wouldn't be my decision It's here Your glory shines so bright So let me learn that the cross precedes the crown To be low is to be high That the valley's where You make me More like Christ
Let me find your grace in the valley Let me find your life in my death Let me find your joy in my sorrow Your wealth in my need That You're near with every breath In the valley
In the daytime there are stars in the heavens But they only shine at night And the deeper that I go into darkness The more I see their radiant light So let me learn that my losses are my gain To be broken is to heal That the valley's where Your power is revealed
Bob Kautlin @2006
Thank you Lord for the words from this song Lord I desperately need the pouring out of your healing touch I desperately need to make sense of all that you bring into my life My heart ponders, weeps and aches I do want so much to be all that you made me to be But, it is such a painful road Lord Why are there so many valleys? I know that I see your power more clearly In the valley of depravity and brokenness
There is nothing in me that is praiseworthy There is nothing in me that is beautiful There is nothing in me that warrants recognition There is nothing in me that is good
Thank you for reminding me that the cross comes before the crown It is in the valleys that I taste the tears of Jesus Thank you Lord for going before me Or I would not stand I would surely die my Lord You are all I need You are here with me In my pain
Had a difficult last two days and have been reflecting on this Psalm. Thank you Lord for your word, for it gives me great comfort and strength! What would I do with you, my God, My Father, My comforter. You are my soul's joy
To you O Lord, I lift up my soul; In you I trust, O my God Do not let me be put to shame, Nor let my enemies triumph over me. No one whose hope is in you Will ever be put to shame...
Show me your ways, O Lord Teach me your paths; Guide me in your truth and teach me, for you are God my Saviour and my hope is in you all day long Remember O Lord, your great mercy and love..
Remember not the sins of my youth and my rebellious ways; according to your love remember me for you are good O Lord Good and upright is the Lord; therefore he instructs sinners in his ways He guides the humble in what is right and teaches them his way All the ways of the Lord are loving and faithful for those who who keep the demands of his covenant For the sake of your name Lord forgive my iniquity though it is great......
The Lord confides in those who fear him; he makes his covenant known to them My eyes are ever on the Lord, for only he will release my feet from the snare Turn to me, and be gracious to me, for I am lonely and afflicted The troubles of my heart have multiplied; free me from my anguish Look upon my affliction and my distress and take away all my sins
Guard my life and rescue me Le me not be put to shame For I take refuge in you May integrity and uprightness protect me Because my hope is in you!!
I want to know you Lord...I want more of you... So much more.... More of your power, your love and your spirit More of your heart and your mind My heart longs for you My heart thirsts and hungers for you To be filled and quenched
Hear my prayer, O Lord Hear my heart beat for you Hear my heart's longing and cry
I want to be completely filled and satisfied by you, and you only.. Here I am, rushing around...doing things for you... But I know you want my sole devotion To sit at your feet, to soak in your voice To be filled with your presence To long for you with every fibre in my being
I want to be all that you want me to be Lord Fill me, wash me, make me, mould me, shape me.. To be yours and yours only... Your daugther, your servant, your child..
What a joy it is to have sisters in the Lord, who share the same passion and love for God and who are united in heart and mind.
It is "intoxicating" to share the same inquisitive minds, pondering over spiritual insights, enquiring of the Lord what He has revealed in His word, mulling over difficult doctrine and revelation...as our hearts beat in anticipation of coming to a fuller understanding of God and His purposes for us and the world.
I reckon that the Christian life is the most exciting life to be lived....not to mention...also the most challenging!! But hey, life would be boring and mundane if it wasn't filled with intriguing questions and deep complexities!! Yes, I truly mean that!!
Anyway, back to sisters! What blessings they are!! God has truly been so kind and gracious to me in giving me beautiful sisters, partners in "crime" =P for the gospel. I love each one of them dearly, and it is my special privilege to share life with them on earth, whilst we wait and look forward to the unfathomable, unimaginable, glory that awaits us all, who long for the day of Jesus' coming again!!
PS...Thanks Maliks for today! You are such a joy and encouragement to me. I love the way you ponder and think through passages in the bible. It is so great to be able to discuss them at length....
I would much rather spend time with you, dialoguing over God's word, than most other things....Yes...I do!! So thanks so much for indulging me and for your beautiful friendship in the Lord. You are a delight!
